STST 649: Special Topics in Military and Strategic Studies

MIDTERM I
Section A - Short Answer (20%)
(1)  It is 4:55 a.m.  A newborn baby projectile-poops on change table, wall, Mommy, nightstand, water glass, alarm clock, diaper wipes dispenser, lamp, lampshade, bed, pillow, and carpet.  Discuss whether the infant constitutes an Improvised Explosive Device or a Weapon of Mass Destruction.  Illustrate with examples.

Bronze is the new gold

As a tribute to Team Canada and its impressive heap of bronze medals at the London Olympics, Emmett competes in the Playground Triathlon (climbing-sliding-rockthrowing) and generates a bronze medal of his own...

At the Stampede, where the sun don't shine

When one loses one's keys at the Stampede grounds, it is essential to look everywhere for them.

Everywhere.

Canada Day Potty Training 2012

A most "memorable" Canada Day weekend was had by StranMcCann. Taking advantage of three days off work, Emmett's Mom and Dad decided to use the long weekend to blitz potty training with Emmett. What a weekend. It certainly pales in comparison to Canada Day's gone by [insert sarcasm here], when they used to bike and hike in the mountains and stay up late to watch fireworks. This year, they were chained to the potty, asking Emmett to "Tell us when you have to use the potty, right?"

Canada Day 2010 - Jasper Parade

Canada Day 2011 - on the beach with cousins in Kelowna

Canada Day 2012 - Housebound with his parents...

...and his big boy underwear.

 Fortunately, and to the delight of his parents, Emmett caught on quickly, and will head off to daycare showered in praise, bursting with big boy pride and clean underwear.

(As much as they wanted to, his parents have refrained from putting the photo of Emmett's first turd-in-the-potty online. An online turd would probably come back to haunt them, in thousands of dollars of therapy when he is 21).

And the crowd goes wild

Emmett registers his first-ever hat trick when, at 2:30 of the third period, he puts his third puck in the, er, net.

Fresh-baked brownies

With last week's headlines dominated by bad news, Emmett took the time to conjure up some material to start this week on a positive note.

Who doesn't like a good belly laugh on a Monday morning?

Just hanging with his mom

Emmett discovered he has hands in recent weeks. They provide hours of endless entertainment, as he sucks and grabs his fingers, and swats random objects. No matter what stimulating toys Emmett's parents put in front of him, hands down, his digits are preferred.

He has also enjoys just hanging out with his mom. Yesterday afternoon, they sung songs together, with Emmett's mom providing the lead vocals...

...and Emmett singing bass...

Grey Cup weekend

This weekend saw the 97th Grey Cup game come to town. On Saturday, Emmett's folks took him to see the Grey Cup Parade. He slept through the whole thing. His parents, however, enjoyed watching hundreds of Saskatchewan fans display their Rider pride...

...but not as much as they enjoyed watching one silly intoxicated Edmonton Eskimos fan drink cheap beer from his glove.

On Grey Cup Sunday, Emmett showed his Rider pride by wearing bright green diapers. And, in an impressive display of solidarity with a million Saskatchewanians, he pooped his green pants when Montreal came from behind and won the game in the dying seconds of the fourth quarter.

Candidate for a Poo-litzer

Volume up. Soundtrack is solid. Elvis-like lip curl right at the end puts it over the top.

Strange affinity for people soup

"I'm so excited for you guys when he poops up to his neck."

That's what cousin Blake expressed to us back in June, having had the experience of a year with a baby of his own. Today, cousin Blake is excited, but not how you might expect.

Today was Emmett's bath day. Mom and Dad dutifully laid out towels, washcloths, soaps, filled the kitchen sink, and plunked him in. As washing proceedings began, Emmett reached the point of maximum relaxation. And then VOOM, he soiled the bath. Mom screamed. Dad rushed in. Emmett was oblivious. Mom and Dad emptied the sink, rinsed the chunks off Emmett, wrapped him in a dry towel, washed the sink, refilled it, and started over.



And then it happened again. Rinse. Wash. Repeat.

The third attempt (Mom and Dad acted quickly this time) yielded one clean child, and two traumatized parents.



Meconium was bad. This was worse. Only divine intervention will save Emmett's parents when he ups his game and finds a new way to unleash his wrath upon them.